Let’s get one thing straight, you are not failing!
Somewhere along the way, the modern working mom was sold a lie. Yes, that’s us, you and me. It’s unfair but if you are like me and love history, we can go back and see that many societies do not let mothers do it all alone! Or even parents in general. In fact, I would argue that part of this has happened because in our current modern society a lot of people have said that “success” looks like balancing a career, a family, a tidy home, and personal growth all without breaking a sweat, asking for help, or letting a single ball drop. Yikes! I don’t know about you but that isn’t reality.
But here’s the truth à
✨ You were never meant to do it all alone. ✨
🔁 The Problem: We’ve Been Conditioned to “Push Through”
In general, our current society has established that pushing through, being tough, working hard without asking for help, as well as burnout being normalized, instant gratification expected at every corner. These aren’t all bad things but in the context of prioritizing your own health and life they sometimes can be. Just like anything, sometimes too much of anything can be bad. Don’t get me wrong, hustle in general can be amazing and it’s needed as are many of these other things. However, we’ve normalized many of the following
- Apologize for asking for help
- See burnout as normal
- Confuse independence with isolation
- Believe that being a “good mom” means doing it all
These are the negatives of pushing through and the cost to these is high! There is increased mental load, emotional exhaustion, and missed moments that matter. So, instead how can we establish a balance and rewrite that narrative in our own lives. Remember it’s the little things that build momentum over time, so as a parent showing your kids the balance will help them and in turn impact others around you as well!
💡 Why Support Is a Strength, Not a Weakness
Have you ever seen one of those runner videos where a runner collapses yards before the finish line of the finish line? Where other runners come up beside him or her and help the runner to the finish line. That’s support, it doesn’t mean that runner wasn’t capable but, at that moment, that runner needed support because they are human. We all need support. Athletes have coaches and trainers and businesses have systems and leadership teams. So why do we think Mom’s and Dad’s can do so much on their own? Why do we push more burden on parents. I can’t fully answer that question right now, though it’s something that I like to think we are all trying to change over time but what I can tell you is that we all need support as support makes you better. So lean into using systems and tools at home, work and as a parent that help make you better!
🧡 What Support Can Look Like
Support is very personal. What works for you may not work for another mom in the neighborhood. It can be flexible, and it changes with the season of life. Just like your support at work changes when someone leaves a position, when a new project starts or whatever else it is. So how can you apply that both at work and with your kids!
Here are a few examples of what support might look like in real life:
At Home:
- A partner who shares the mental load, not just tasks
- A weekly meal delivery plan that removes decision fatigue
- Hiring a sitter or trading childcare with another mom
- Letting the laundry pile and choosing rest anyway
- Getting the kids involved, even if it means the first few times are harder
At Work:
- Delegating tasks in your business that drain you
- Focusing on the 80% that moves the needle as a priority and balancing the 20%
- Automating admin work with systems and templates
- Asking a peer for feedback
- Saying no to one more commitment you don’t have capacity for
In Community:
- A group chat with other working moms who get it
- Therapy, coaching, or mentorship
- Being honest with a friend: “I’m struggling today.”
- Asking for what you actually need, not what feels polite
🌱 From Supermom to Supported Mom
It’s hard to ask for help but I can tell you that your life will be more sustainable if you do. You don’t need to be rescued but a little help (yes even if it’s Instacart) can help support you and give you a little more joy and energy. Habits are hard to change, there is no doubt about that but you deserve to find joy more often and there is nothing wrong with asking for help. You can still hustle and strive for more and work hard but use the tools around you! Honestly, showing your children that asking for help is normal is a wonderful lesson! It’s wise and loving to both you and them.
Imagine a new model of motherhood and entrepreneurship where:
- Rest is respected
- Systems make space
- Asking for help is normal, not shameful
- Success includes joy, not just survival
Because when you invite support in:
- You reclaim your energy
- You model healthy boundaries for your children
- You create space to show up with more presence (not perfection)
🛠 Ready to Build Your Support System?
Here’s one small step:
Write down three things you’re carrying right now that feel too heavy.
Then ask:
- Can I share this load?
- Can I systemize it?
- Can I let it go for now?
You don’t have to do it all to be enough.
Let’s normalize doing it together. Let us know if you have any tips for how you ask for support!
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